Sirius Black ([info]sirius_noir) wrote in [info]su_logs,
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Sirius, Remus, Severus, and Bill - a confrontation: Monday, 9 August, late evening

After Remus and Sirius have this argument about the information Sirius has been keeping from him, Remus goes to Snape's office to demand an explanation.




Severus: *douses the last of the lights in the laboratory, shutting the doors and moving into the sitting room, waving an idle hand at the window, which opens and spills cool air into the stifling room, pads barefoot to an armchair, the torches on the wall flaring to life at his presence, and sits with the book Weasley had brought in his lap, open to the first pages, and begins to read* *reads silently, unmoving, gnawing absently at his lower lip, a cup of tea left beside him by an anxious, well-meaning house-elf gone cold*

Remus: *storms down the dank corridors down to Severus' quarters, shoving down the knot in his throat, focussing instead on his need for information* *knocks roughly* Severus? *knocks again without waiting* Severus, I know you're in there. We are going to talk. Now.

Severus: *looks up from his book, frowning, then glowering as he recognises the voice* *slams the book shut, gestures at the door, which swings open and reveals a very agitated Remus Lupin* What in blazes do you want? *angrily* Do you realise what time it is, Lupin?

Remus: *gestures impatiently* You always boast of being up late working anyway. *looks at him* I know, Severus. I know about Sirius' new marks. And you are going to tell me what you know. Now.

Severus: *stares at him for a moment, incredulous* How dare you? *rises from his chair, putting the book down on the table beside it* How dare you burst into my chambers and make demands of me. It is not MY doing that you are ill-informed, you arrogant twit. Take it up with Black.

Remus: *rolls his eyes* I'm not arguing with the fact that you did not share all your precious little secrets until now. I am here now *because* I have been talking to Sirius, but he keeps claiming he doesn't understand. I suspect you do. As his partner, I believe I am entitled to know what the hell is going on with him. So, yes, I *dare* to demand this of you. Whatever you know about those marks, you are going to share, or you are going to be tripping over me in your doorway until you do. *eyes him* I believe you prefer me to stay as far away from you as possible, so the sooner you tell me, the sooner I'll leave you to your own devices again.

Severus: I will not be told what to do by the likes of you, Lupin. You have no authority here, and this does not, did not, concern you. Obviously. *glowers, sets his jaw* Besides, the answers you want are not mine to give. If Black wishes you to know, then he can give me leave to explain. *looks at Lupin, pointedly* It is his body. His fate.

Remus: Fine. I'll get him for you. *turns to go back to Sirius' rooms*

Sirius: *bursts in as Padfoot and transforms the moment he hits the door, panting, shirt only halfway back on and looking very disshevelled* Remus, listen, just - *stops short when he sees the two of them, realises they are talking about him* *runs his hands roughly through his hair* What are you doing?

Severus: *eyebrow, taking in Black's rumpled figure* ...excellent timing, Black. The werewolf was just demanding that I tell him everything I know regarding the marks upon your body.

Remus: *turns to Sirius* I told you I was coming here. And yes, Severus has gallantly refused to say a single word without your express permission. *looks slightly challengingly at Sirius* Am I allowed to know what he knows, or are you going to continue to keep up the secrecy?

Severus: *watches the exchange, carefully, though his eyes remain hard and fixed on Black*

Sirius: *opens and closes his mouth wordlessly for a moment, and then nods, shoulders slumping slightly, whether in defeat or relief it is not clear* I'm not going to hide it from you anymore. *turns to Snape* Would you explain it? I don't know if I can explain it all. *puts the parchment scrolls Snape gave him earlier and that he swiped on his way out the door onto a table near Remus* That might help.

Remus: *exhales a breath he didn't know he was holding* *turns back to Severus, speaking over politely* There - permission granted. May I please come in and taint your quarters now?

Severus: *looks disgruntled* Very well. *eyes them both, pausing to glare viciously at Lupin* Get in here, then. *waves a hand at the door, which swings shut behind Black* Don't touch anything. *looks at Lupin as he says that*

Remus: *rolls his eyes* Of course. Wouldn't think of it.

Sirius: *tugs at his hair frustratedly and sits, but then gets up again and starts pacing, waiting for Snape to explain*

Severus: *takes a deep breath and picks up the scrolls Black had brought, unrolling one to reveal the original transcription, the sketch of Black's body with the markings in their appropriate places* This may be of some assistance to you. *hands it to Lupin* These are what I have successfully translated or referenced thus far. *eyes flick to Black, gauging his reaction as Lupin looks over the picture*

Sirius: *fidgets, shoving his hands in his pockets and trying not to read over Remus's shoulder even though he already knows what it says; he finds it so bizzare that they are talking about him and he doesn't quite understand it all himself*

Remus: *takes the chart and studies it, eyes flicking to Sirius and what he can see of the marks where his unbuttoned shirt is hanging open* You've got quite a bit of information already, I see. *points to what looks like Egyptian hieroglyphs on the chart* This is what you needed Bill for, isn't it?

Severus: *nods, and goes on to explain the many different languages inscribed all over Black's body, occasionally addressing Black directly in an effort not to make him feel as though he is a specimen on display, though he doesn't really know why, goes on to explain that the different languages, markings, etc. each represent different belief structures, though the Egyptian seems to be the most thorough* *looks slightly frustrated, trying to explain a bit more about that* *exhales, rubbing his temples* Sod it, I need- *stalks to the hearth, plucking powder from a jar on the mantle and chucking it into the fire* Weasley, get down here. *fire blooms and turns into a cyclone of green and, eventually, ginger hair as Weasley comes through the fire and stumbles into the room, looking slightly bewildered*

Bill: *looks around at the occupants of the room, his eyes growing wider as he registers each face* Er.... *coughs slightly*

Remus: *is slightly soothed to know that Bill has joined their very strange and very tense meeting* *sighs tiredly* You don't have to keep it secret anymore, Bill. *gestures towards the diagram of Sirius* I know now. At least some of it. *nods towards the Potions Master* Severus is just explaining it now.

Severus: *nods at Weasley, eyes flicking quickly at the others before speaking* I thought best to leave the Egyptian aspect to you, Weasley. *cannot hold back a small sneer* I realise that I ought not have wasted breath asking for your discretion, earlier. *glances at Black, and looks away quickly*

Sirius: *continues pacing and looking around, growing increasingly uncomfortable, and getting the uncomfortable sensation that he is being watched, the hair on the back of his neck prickling oddly* *shrugs it off and concentrates on the conversation at hand*

Bill: *swallows nervously* Well, er. *glances at Remus, relieved at least that everything is out in the open* You all know, then. Sev -- *catches himself, has never called Snape anything but Professor, but Remus' reference has caught him off guard* I mean, Professor Snape showed me the hieroglyphs, and when translated, they appear to be a phrase from the Pyramids at Sakkara... the type of thing used in royal burials. *glances at Snape* Is that... shall I say more?

Severus: *listens to Weasley speak, uneasy at having so many people in his quarters at once, nevermind one of them being Lupin, who had until Weasley's appearance seemed angry, and anxious, though now he watches Bill intently* *narrows his eyes and looks over at Black, who has begun to pace, and who seems nervous, uncomfortable, and slightly paranoid* *is suddenly aware he is being addressed, looks back to Weasley* Tell him about Sothis.

Bill: *Bill nods, and, still trying to adjust to the circumstance of being summoned to a discussion with Snape, Remus, and Sirius, begins a more thorough explanation of Egyptian mythology, with regards to the star Sothis, and its meaning in the afterlife. It relaxes him slightly to talk about Egypt, and he begins to pace, becoming more absorbed in the subject matter... when he has finished, he looks around apprehensively.*

Remus: *nods* Thanks, Bill. *fingers roam over the chart, gives a sidelong glance at the edgy-looking Sirius* *much of his anger has taken a backseat for the moment now that he's finally getting the information he wanted, but his chest still clenches now that he's beginning to understand what was being kept from him* Anything else I should know about?

Severus: *clears throat* There is the matter of Luna Lovegood. *gives Black a significant look*

Sirius: *coughs, shifting his weight from foot to foot* She's apparantly a Necromens. And she can 'talk' to the dead, and those who 'guard' them. And she said... *shakes his head; he can't really say it*

Remus: *glances between Severus and Sirius* Said what?

Severus: *is still looking at Black* They want him back. *tries not to flinch when Black does, though he is not successful* She says that they - whomever, whatever 'they' are, want him back. They are making plans. They intend to retrieve what was stolen from Them.

Remus: *nods as he fits this together with what Sirius said earlier* *quietly* That much Sirius told me. *looks seriously at Bill and Severus* Do you think they'll get him back, given what you know of his marks?

Severus: *glances at Weasley, then looks back to Black, silently*

Bill: *looks stunned, as he has not heard about Luna* I... I can't say. I didn't know about what the Necromens told you. It's... well, let's just say... if they want to do something, they probably could. But this is out of my realm of experience. *shakes his head* I think this is out of the realm of anyone's experience.

Sirius: *turns away from the group, pretending to be very interested in the spines of some books on the shelf, but not really looking at them at all*

Severus: *quietly* It is a possibility. *eyes suddenly flash in anger, and train on Lupin* That is why I am DOING this, Lupin. To prevent that possibility from becoming a reality. Black is going nowhere. *even he is startled by the venom, the growl in his own voice* *stalks over to his desk, rummaging through his notes, seemingly searching for something*

Remus: *his anger flares again* Yes, well, it seems to me that the more information you have, the better. So *don't* go snapping at me for a situation not of my own making. I was being kept in the dark when I could have been helping.

Severus: *looks up, utterly snarling* And what help could you have provided, Lupin? Are you well-versed in the ancient languages enough to recognise Sanskrit when you see it? Are you a curse-breaker with extensive knowledge of the hieroglyphs? Were you force-fed Catholicism from the time you were old enough to walk? Would you know an alchemical symbol if it bit you in the arse? *finds what he is looking for, a very old book, nearly coming apart at the seams and shedding dust as Snape plucks it from the desk* It did not concern you. *I* did not intentionally keep this from you. I merely respected the wishes of the one who DID.

Sirius: *whirls around so suddenly that he knocks a few books off the shelf, his hands clenched into tight fists* Stop - both of you just shut up! Stop with the 'he said-you said-I didn't say-none of your business' because it's driving me fucking mad! I'm not trying to hide anything from anyone, it just fucking happened. I didn't ask to come back, I didn't ask to be some sort of cosmic autograph book, I'm not plotting some goddamn conspiracy to keep anyone 'out of the know' - I just don't know - what - to -DO! *slams his hand down against the bookshelves, and there's a shatter and tinkle of glass from a far corner of the room*

Bill: *somewhere, between Snape and Sirius' outbursts, a realisation has formed in Bill's head, something so startling that he finds himself staring first at Snape, then Sirius, until he catches himself. Snape, he thinks, is reacting the way... the way he himself would react, if it were Remus. Suddenly Snape's behavior begins to fall into place... everything makes sense, his great passion for the research, his utter hatred for Remus... Bill is stunned into atypical silence, although a part of him is nonetheless furious at Snape for snapping at Remus*

Remus: *turns to Sirius* *too calmly* Yes, but you did hide it. Severus is utterly right that it wasn't for him to say. *nods at Bill* Or Bill, either. And I *know* you didn't ask to come back or for any of this to happen, and I see now just how far-reaching the problem might be. But breaking every teacup and phial from here to China isn't going to help. Working on the answer so you can stay, will. *turns to Severus* I may not be as well-versed in arcane languages as you are, but I *am* a Dark Arts expert. *raises eyebrow* I believe necromancy qualifies.

Severus: *ignores Lupin, still reeling, gaping at Black who has suddenly become more alive in ten seconds than he has been since his return, his eyes bright and his face red, looking for all the world like a mad dog* *stares unabashedly, ignoring the others, staring at Black as though he's never seen him before* *something prickles at the back of his mind, and suddenly there is a sinking sensation in his stomach, his blood runs cold* *Oh, bloody hell...* *swallows thickly, and when he speaks his voice is quiet, hoarse and completely foreign to his own ears* You have done all that can - should - be expected of you, S- Black. *clears his throat* I doubt very much that any of us in this room would have done any different. For someone in your situation, you... have endured admirably. *finally looks away, down at the book in his hands, avoiding everyone's eyes, willing the heat to flee his face*

Sirius: *slumps back against the bookcase, eyes closed; he has no idea what to make of Remus's comment about teacups and phials nor any idea why Snape has decided so say something downright pleasant at all, much less in front of anyone else* *lets his head fall back against the shelf with a thud, feeling as though everything has toppled over and spilled out* *quietly, to everyone and no one in particular* I'm sorry.

Remus: *takes a deep breath, concern for Sirius and guilt over upsetting him further warring with the underscore of anger and frustration that he was the one who created the situation by trying to hide it from Remus - as well as his irritation at Severus for making him look unsympathetic* *looks over the diagram one more time, then hands it back to Severus* I'm guessing this conversation has gone about as far as it's going to go for tonight. *nods at Severus* Thank you for explaining what you knew. Feel free to call on me if you think there is any chance I might be able to help with further research.

Bill: *Bill feels a tight knot of misery form in his stomach at Remus' words... he tries to catch Remus' eye* Remus... er... *realises he has no idea what to say* *quietly* I'm sorry mate.

Severus: *looks up at Lupin and, after a moment, nods in return* You may be of some use after all. *says this with clenched teeth, eyes flicking to Black, a crumpled heap of defeat on the floor, the life from before having gone out, leaving him as distant as he'd been before* Start brushing up on your Necromancy. Should I- should we require more information on the subject... I will contact you. *looks utterly pained at having to be so civil to Lupin, looks away, utterly furious at the situation*

Remus: *shakes his head at Bill* *quietly* Don't apologise. At least I know now. *to Severus* Thank you. *absently notes the look that passes from Severus to Sirius, without really processing it* *goes over and pulls Sirius to his feet, his hand lingering briefly on Sirius arm before letting go* We'll talk more later, all right? *casts a quick look around at the others, struggling to meet Bill's eyes now that he's standing right next to Sirius* I have a lot to think about - I think it's time l bid you all good-night. *exits without another word or look at Sirius*

Bill: *Bill doesn't miss Remus' touch on Sirius' arm, and at the sight of it, he suddenly feels that he needs to be anywhere but this room* *glancing at Sirius and Snape, he realises that his exit may not even be noticed* Right then... Sirius... Professor... er, let me know if you need me again. *turns and walks quickly out of the room, his mind on Remus and the remaining firewhiskey homebrew in his quarters*

Sirius: *covers his arm with his free hand, as if he can still feel where Remus touched him* *nods slowly when Remus says he is leaving, and again when Bill does the same, and after they leave his knees feel like they will no longer hold him up, and he slides back down to the floor, avoiding meeting Snape's eyes*

Severus: *watches Weasley go, knowing full well why he's chosen to flee; the wounded look on his face had not gone unnoticed* Good riddance. *mutters indifferently, turns and regards Black, slumped against the bookshelf, looking miserable* *tucks one hand into his pocket, the other still hefting the ancient book in his hand* *does not know what to say* Are you... all right? *speaks finally, quietly, approaching Black and standing over him, looking down at the top of his frantic hair* That was accidental magic, again.

Sirius: No. *sighs, a very defeated, tired sound* I fucked up. Fucked things up even more than they were before, if that's possible.

Severus: *heaves a sigh, half-annoyance, half-fatigue, but says nothing and sits down on the floor beside him, elbows against his knees, turning the book over and over in his hands, looking at it* I resent having things demanded of me. He is fortunate I did not choose to hex him where he stood, for that. *glances over* Why did you not tell him?

Sirius: *flatly* I didn't want to say anything until there was something more definite to say. I - *realises how lame it sounds but doesn't have the energy to care* I didn't want him to worry any more than necessary.

Severus: *traces the spine of the book with a finger* So you chose instead to withhold something from an infuriatingly perceptive werewolf. Did he not ask you, when he saw the markings? What did you tell him then?

Sirius: *shakes his head; he doesn't really see the point in rehashing all of this nor does he have the stomach for it* I started to explain, but I don't really understand it all myself, and it just wasn't a good enough explanation.

Severus: *nods* Because you don't know yourself. *quiet for a moment* Black... I- We- *snorts* Sod this. Black, there's little I can offer you in the way of comfort. I still do not know enough to be able to give you anything more than a series of history lessons. I... I am sorry. For that. *coughs, feigns interest in the book*

Sirius: *shrugs one shoulder listlessly* Don't be sorry. You ... and Weasley are doing what you can. *realises for the first time since storming in that his shirt is still hanging open; pulls it closed and crosses his arms over his chest, looking at his knees*

Severus: *looks at Black for a long moment, and decides that it is indeed time to change the subject* The potion I gave you, Black - has it worked? Have you slept these last two nights?

Sirius: *shakes his head slowly* It made me groggy and I dozed for a few minutes, but that was it. It was almost like I hadn't really taken anything at all.

Severus: *grimly* I had suspected as much. The cause of your sleeplessness is not natural, and therefore it is not likely traditional methods will counter it. *sighs* It was worth a try, however. *hefts the book, then passes it to Black* Here.

Sirius: *takes it from him but does not open it* *eyes the dusty, worn cover* What is it?

Severus: It is old. *scratches his nose, stretches a leg out in front of him, frowning as he remembers that his feet are bare, and wondering idly where his slippers have got to* I uncovered it in my personal library. It is a relic from a time when I... *inhales* ...utilised certain talents in a rather dubious fashion. *clears throat* Inside there you will find a method of assisting sleep that I think may be the only way in which to help you. *looks at him, carefully* It would require some level of... trust, on your part. In... me.

Sirius: *runs his fingers over the cover* Certain talents? *frowns, opens the book carefully, skimming the first few pages silently* Oh... no. No. *closes the book abruptly* I'm not doing this. Forget it.. sorry. *with more certainty* No.

Severus: Black. *voice even, and firm, reaching over and pushing the book back toward him, hands covering Black's own* *they are cold* Read it, before you make any sweeping declarations. It may be your only recourse, if you ever want to rest again. *thinly* It is not as though the idea appeals to me, however... I am willing. *frowns* Just read it, you idiot.

Sirius: *is quiet for a long moment, not moving, turning things over in his mind* *abruptly* Fine. I'll read it over and think about it. *has no intention of doing so, as the entire idea makes him extremely uncomfortable*

Severus: *looks at him* Do yourself a favour, Black. *gets up, grunting a little at having sat on a floor for the first time in years* For once in your life - lives - try doing what is asked of you, instead of the opposite. *looks down at him, and after a moment, extends a hand*

Sirius: *looks at his hand for a moment before taking it and getting to his feet, the book tucked under his other arm* *doesn't let go right away, as if he doesn't realise he still has hold of Snape's hand, then lets go suddenly* *hears what Snape has said and knows, partly, that he is making some sense, but doesn't really want to think about it at the moment* I... think I need to go.

Severus: *is staring at his hand, then looks up, and clears his throat, tucking that hand into his pocket and striding quickly to the door* Yes, I should think so. *opens the door, for once without magic, not really looking at Black but glancing at him* Black- I am serious, read the book. Take your time. When you're ready... *clears his throat again* Come see me.

Sirius: *nods, looking slightly dazed* All right. I'll read it. *shifts uncomfortably* I... *shakes his head, as if he changed his mind about something he intended to say* Goodnight.


Severus: *frowns slightly, but decides in the face of Black's disturbing bewilderment, to overlook whatever was not said, and steps aside to allow Black out into the corridor* *is unnerved by the blank expression on his face, the utter... helplessness he sees when he looks him in the eye* *startled, speaks as though on autopilot* ...goodnight, Sirius. *closes the door* *as soon as the door closes he freezes, realising at once what he's just said* ...Bloody hell. *stalks off toward his stores, looking for alcohol - and a lot of it*




Meanwhile...


Remus: *walks back to his rooms, unable to even contemplate going back to Sirius' quarters, lost in thought, his stomach a knot of misery and confusion*

Bill: *as he begins to climb the stairs to the upper floors of the castle, sees Remus some distance ahead of him... he can tell Remus' mood just by the way he is walking, his shoulders hunched in tension*.... *suddenly feels he has to do something, though he's not sure what... quickens his pace to catch up*

Remus: *doesn't even notice the footsteps, he's so turned inward*

Bill: *is caught up to Remus before he realises it... is overwhelmed with emotion, not thinking* *puts a hand on Remus' shoulder* Remus?

Remus: *turns with a start* Bill - sorry, I didn't hear you coming* *is conscious of Bill touching him* If you're coming to apologise again for keeping Sirius' secret - it's all right. Really. I know why you had to do it.

Bill: *shakes his head, unable to speak... just looks at Remus for a long moment, then leans in and kisses him deeply*

Remus: *is taken completely by surprise and, in his befuddled state, all he can do is react, responding to the kiss almost desperately before wrenching away* Bill ... I ... *can barely form the words, so much is in his head right now* You know I can't.

Bill: *takes a step back, realising what he's done -- acted without thinking, as he always does, as he can't seem to help... * *sees the look in Remus' eyes, and feels his heart turn over in response* I... *takes another step back* Fuck, I'm sorry, Remus, I didn't think -- *turns and walks away, in long hurried strides*

Remus: *watches him go, heart clenching, the feel of the kiss still on his lips* *forces himself to move, continuing on to his own rooms, where he lies awake most of the night, thinking*

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